#45: Holidaying

I talk about what’s going on now and what’s happening in the future. My husband is visiting this area for the first time ever soon, so that’s pretty exciting. This is the last episode for the year, so happy holidays and have a great end of the year.

The website at Complicated Noise is up in its not-quite-finished form. Visit it at your own risk!

Midpoint

I’m about halfway through my vacation in the USA now. Time passes by so fast and in so many ways, that’s pretty scary. Incredibly, I am not really sick of being here yet. I know in my podcast, I say some pretty terrible things about where I was raised, but it has a bit of charm about it and my family here as well, and that’s what’s most important to me. I just want to be around and spend a bit of time with them while I can.

If x = the date I arrived, and y = the date I’m leaving, then we’re approaching the midpoint…

It’s been nice so far. My husband arrives in a few days for a few weeks so I think that will be pretty exciting in itself and maybe when he’ll leave, I’ll be ready to return to Australia, but I’m not so sure this time. It feels like every time I come back, it’s harder to go back to Australia however I know if I stay here, I will start to miss the charm of Australia. So, it’s a no-win situation.

When you’re a dual citizen or live so far from where you grew up, It’s a bit hard because you want to be here, but at the same time, you want to be in the place where your life is. It’s hard. It’s always been hard. Even if the people around here bug the crap out of me sometimes, I think it would be doable.

Some of my time has been spent thinking about sticking around but because I’m married and settled in Australia, it just complicates things ever so slightly.

#44: Birthday Celebrations

I talk a little bit about my birthday and the problems I’m having with my podcast and recording. I’ve decided to record short ones for now and might change that once I get back. I honestly can’t remember what I’ve talked about in this one. I used my phone to record this time because the audio quality was awful using my AirPods.

There is one more episode before I take a little break. I think that’s next week. My husband comes to my hometown next Friday, so I’m going to try my best to do it before then.

The website at Complicated Noise is up in its not-quite-finished form. Visit it at your own risk!

CN Episodes While I’m in the USA

You’re probably sick and tired of me posting updates about how I am pushing planned podcast episodes around. Well, this is another one of those.

I’ve explained how recording and editing has been a little challenging, and I’m not completely sure I can even meet my lax goals of podcast publishing. I’m going to try, but it looks like that I’m going to record short, straight-to-the-point episodes until I leave.

This is what I am planning until I go back home:

The episodes above will be short (15 minutes at the most). Then, I think I will go to monthly podcast episodes for a while. I am starting to feel podcasting fatigue. It was bound to happen.

That’s it! Just keeping you updated!

Two Years of Marriage Equality in Australia

Two years ago, on this date… well, not really because I’m about 17 hours behind or something, marriage equality was made law in Australia. Time sure does fly. I thought I’d reflect on that a little bit and share a little bit of a story with you about my marriage.

One of the things that my partner and I made clear is that we didn’t want to end up in something that would run its course in a month or two, then fade away. I told him that I was still a little jaded by a certain previous relationship and I think it would take some time for me to come to the realisation that I would ultimately want something long term. I still have an aching feeling of mistrust sometimes and it’s not because of who he is, but what I’ve gone through in that particular relationship.

When we first got together, it was great and I found myself to be pretty happy and wanting to be with or around this person all the time. One of the things we realised is that we attended the same university and so we’d sneak in lunches and things together when we could. I also told him that he’s welcome to stay with me on his early days because he was living about an hour and a half away from the university, whereas I was about 2 or 3 suburbs over from the university.

I guess things were pretty solid. Then, while I was here in the USA, I got a video of him proposing to me (on Valentine’s Day–too predictable if you ask me). I watched it and thought about it for a few days. I told my closest family members and my friends and I had to explain that it was about 8 months after we met and I am a little weirded out about getting married so early.

I eventually said yes, but to buy myself time, I said that we probably should wait a while and test the water a bit before we dive in. That wait ended up being a few years. Because…

I finally realised that I was getting older and who knows if this opportunity of a lifetime would happen again. I think that my family members probably didn’t want to see me alone and well, I didn’t want to be alone. Being single has it perks, but sometimes I just crave someone to lay my head on at night. I also told him that we’d go to New Zealand, where, at the time, same-sex marriage was legal. I started thinking that I don’t have an emotional attachment to NZ, so if I didn’t have to, I wouldn’t do it there. Then, I said we would do it when we go to the USA together. (I time my visits every 3 years now, so it would have been a wait, but at least I could get people to attend.) I know my partner was starting to get a little impatient and I think he was thinking that I was just going to disappear one day. Then, I finally said, let’s do it in Australia if and when it becomes legal. When it does, and we haven’t done it yet, we’ll get married in Australia.

Well, the debates were getting hot and it looked like it was going to happen. I had to have other people surveyed to see whether my relationship was valid enough to get married or not. Well, the Australian people spoke and said ‘yes’. A few months later, we were taking our wedding photos and planning for a very small ceremony in Melbourne.

In July 2017, it happened. And it’s been great. I am so incredibly happy and proud of the man I married and even happier because I got to do it in the country I love. (I love the USA too in its own way, don’t get me wrong, but my life had almost entirely shifted to Australia.)

And so, we’re going on two years of marriage now and about 5 years of being a couple. It’s been a great few years. My mental health is a lot better being with this guy who, strangely is a mental health warrior. Every day I feel so lucky being with someone who I don’t fully ‘get’ all the time, but he’s been an adorable, wonderful guy regardless. I freakin’ love him to bits and can’t wait until he’s here on US soil.

So yes, two years of it being law. I hope anybody who reads this who fought for the right to marry someone of the same sex in Australia knows how extremely thankful I am for the opportunity and for working so incredibly hard to make it happen.

Podcast Publishing Dates Reshuffled

Be thankful that I still care enough to post these things. Right now, I’m not really sure how long I’m going to keep this up. Maybe my schedule that I made for myself was a bit too eager. Anyway, I said that I’d do them, but I need to shuffle a few of them around because I’m too lazy to record and I also must record them when I’m by myself which isn’t going to happen during this USA visit (and that’s not really a bad thing).

I know the quality on the last recording wasn’t that great so I’m going to try something different. I brought along my microphone, but it’s only so portable. So instead of using the Airpods this time, I’ll switch to the iPhone-included earbuds next time. We will see how that goes. Maybe I can get some volume to my voice without feeling like I’m screaming! (Actually, I’m not sure what was recording my voice… was it my watch or was it the Airpods?)

Right now, I’m moving the one that’s supposed to be published on the 6th to the 11th or 13th, and the one that is supposed to be published on the 20th to the 23rd or 24th. I’m going to try my best to get them done before then, because the 20th until the 31st will be incredibly busy for my husband and me.

Anyway, again, I hope you’re well. Everybody take care of yourselves!

Birthday

Another birthday has come and gone. I’m officially the big 40 now so I feel like this is probably the best time for me to rethink what I’m doing with my life–where I am now, and where I want to be going later. I feel like maybe now is the time to finally start acting like a mature adult instead of a forever-struggling 20 year old. It’s just incredible that I made it this far, honestly. For a while there, I thought I’d never age. Getting older is unavoidable.

I don’t want to go into too much detail about how my party went because I try to save that stuff for podcasting. I haven’t recorded it just yet.

It’s really nice being back home at this time of the year. I love the holidays back in Texas. I just recently got over my jet lag so I’m trying to get out a bit more now. I still don’t want to drive during the day because I’m still in Australia-mode driving-wise. I tried driving on the wrong side of the road and then realised what I was doing. That’s the bad thing when the traffic isn’t so bad. You don’t have any hints of where you’re supposed to be on the road.

I also took a short little trip around the university that I used to go to here. A lot has changed.

Anyway, I hope everyone reading this is doing well. 🙂 Take good care of yourselves. I’m going to try to post more this month. There are a lot of things in my head–a few of them I can’t post here or anywhere for that matter. Nothing gross or creepy, but just feelings.

Bye for now! 🙂