That Wonderful Online Life

NOTE: This post isn’t an indication of anything in my current relationship, so Dear, don’t be alarmed.

I originally titled this “Things F*** Up Sometimes” and started talking about how people like me who document their life on the internet will conveniently forget certain things happen when it comes to negative things in life. It paints people as these perfect individuals who have the perfect life. It doesn’t really happen that way though. Perfect doesn’t exist OR if you think about it, the “perfect” life is how you define it.

I totally believe this.

I thought about the times when I would mention someone I was dating, only a short time later realise that it probably wasn’t the best person for me. Instead of mentioning that things have ended, I’d basically pretend like it didn’t happen. Of course, for the past few years I’ve discovered that it’s probably not the best idea to talk about my love life here in detail. I just kind of complain about my current partner a bit. He knows it and he gets a tiny bit offended sometimes. I’m still afraid that if I say too much, then it can really cause big issues for him back at home, so I keep our relationship a little more guarded than I would have in the past.

There are so many examples of the “my life is so awesome” thing happening on Facebook. You know, it’s the “look at me, I’m 40 years old, I change my last name on my profile after we’ve been dating 2 weeks, I love him/her so much, and 99.494% of our pictures are of us kissing” people. A few months later, it’s someone else. They just pretend like it’s an easy transition from person A to person B. They try so hard to make things look so perfect to everybody else, but I think everybody knows that it’s not all sunshine and rainbows for them. It’s what they want, but they don’t have. Who are they kidding? Everybody can see right through it.

I know there are usually underlying mental and emotional issues there and it’s not really nice for me to say things like that. I think everybody wants and needs that relationship (and emotional) stability, yet it’s impossible for them to get that. So, as a result, they paint this picture of how great things are, until they totally mess up.

I’ve read a few articles about how Facebook can really screw you up, pull out the depression monster in you, etc. My doctor last year suggested that I give it up completely but had to say that I couldn’t do that because it’s where the rest of my family congregates. There’s also not many people there who I get jealous over when I see them happy with their partner. (Sometimes I wish that I could take pics with my partner and post them, but it’s a no-no. That’s fine. I’d much rather him or his family get harassed.) With the perfect couples, I guess I’m happy for them, if it’s genuine and it’s not overly done.

I guess what I am saying is that no one’s life is 100% flawless and if you see that on Facebook, it’s probably anything but flawless. It may be a cover of some really nasty arguments. That’s also a reason why I am happy not posting much about my relationship with my partner on there. I think those relationships where you don’t have to keep validating for a bunch of friends, relatives and/or strangers do the best.

(Super early on the weekend when I wrote this. May sound incoherent.)

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