Idiologic

Hello! What's been happening with you lately? I hope everything's going great for you. Just a short little update that I have re-enabled comments on an anonymous level and boy, am I regretting it. By all the spam I'm getting, I have the absolutely best website with the most wonderful pieces of information. I think we all know that it's not true. I now know that a lot of this kind of spamming is being done by scripts and I'm getting quite sick and tired of it. I thought about banning certain IP addresses from commenting but I don't think that's going to work since a lot of these fools are just bypassing that check anyway.

So it's damned if I do, damned if I don't. It's just one of those little irritations that I hate. It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't get emailed about each and every comment someone makes. Sure, I could disable that system-wide but then what if someone actually says something worth posting???

I'll be looking into other ways to stop the spam for good.

Hello and good morning, good afternoon or good evening--yes, I think that includes everyone. If it doesn't, well - I hope you have a good night. There! Got it!

For those who don't know, I became an Australian citizen last year around the beginning of August and well, Australia has a federal election coming up in September and let me tell you, I'm pretty excited about it. Why? Because this is the first time I get to vote in an Australian federal election. Just like the USA, there are two dominant players going at each other. 

Elections are not optional here and if you do not vote, you risk being fined. I believe that is how elections should be so there is a better representation of "what the people want". I would love if the USA was like that as well but let's remember that Australia is roughly the same size of the mainland of the USA is roughly 310 million vs Australia's 23 million.

It's no secret that I vote Democrat in US elections, usually it's a Democrat vote right down the board. (Though, I had registered as a Republican under my dad's encouragement--I had no idea what being a Republican meant... I was young and obviously uneducated in politics!)

Here, in Australia, the closest political party to the Democrats is the Australian Labor Party (ALP) who I stand behind 100%. The ALP's national platform closely/mostly resembles my own ideals. 

Having said that, I will be voting Labor this year and I do not see that changing in the future.

PS: I know this is poorly composed but I am multi-tasking here, as always! :)

A fact that some of you might not know is that my stomach can't handle coffee so when I drink it, I make sure I'm at home. (When I have to go out for coffee, I usually get a hot chocolate with a marshmallow...) So yes, about 3-4 hours ago, I thought that I'd have a coffee here at home and made myself some. Me, brew my own coffee? That's silly! Why do that when companies are kind enough to make it easy for you, right? Looking through my 3-in-1 coffees stash, I come across this little beauty:

So yes, I drink a little bit and say to myself, "Damn, this is some strong coffee." This is usually my first hint that it's going to send me to the bathroom after I'm done. I didn't listen to my brain (as always) and while talking to a friend of mine - I had to make a break for the toilet. I hadn't even finished saying goodbye when I... yes, you get the rest of it.

Do I like coffee? Yes, I do. I have a thing for Asian coffees. Some of the best I've had was from Manila (which I hear had an unpleasant additive, but it was still good). I drink some from Malaysia and Taiwan as well. (The pic above is a coffee from Malaysia.) When I was younger, I used to steal my mom's cold, black coffee. I still love room temperature coffee. Now, I seem to like it half-coffee/half-milk. If I can get it decaf, that's even better.

Unfortunately, since I was in kindergarten, I have had problems with my stomach. It gives me trouble before job interviews, sometimes before working a shift, before presentations and it causes me to miss a lot of important stuff. I like to blame it on stress. Add coffee to the mix and BAM!!! Unpleasantness. Lots of it. Sometimes I wish that my stomach didn't go crazy every time it has a chance. Sometimes I wish I could be like most of the general public and DO things that involve stress and/or coffee.

Oh, and Mormons aren't allowed to drink coffee because "it turns your stomach into leather". Pfft. Yes, and dancing closer than arms-length with a girl will get her pregnant. 

So that's my weblog entry on coffee. :) Not good, but hey, I'm posting, right? Semi-regularly? In a way?

I kind of wish that the work I had to do would just do itself! So busy, so tired... so coffee-fueled.

Not so great news from Boston. My heart goes out to those affected by the bombings there. I will never understand why some people are so hell-bent on making other people miserable in order to prove some kind of stupid point. We Americans can't be brought down so easily. Yes, we've seen that chaotic events can really screw things up temporarily but we always leap to our feet and do what it takes to return to a life of normalcy.

What has bothered me is that, while watching the news here, that there was an emphasis on a man of Middle Eastern appearance running away. What people fail to realize is that this guy could have been escaping the damage. A lot of the comments on news sites labels this guy a terrorist and I've also read that this guy was actually brought down (forcefully) because of what he looked like. Are we really still going to think this way?

I've said this before but think that I should say it again: Bad people exist everywhere.  There are good people and bad people. Religion, race, gender, sexual orientation... all that stuff is irrevelevant. It's impossible to judge people without really getting to know him... so my heart goes out to those people in the USA who may appear to be of Middle Eastern appearance. There are some of us who completely understand what's going on and I'm sorry that some of the people from my home country (and other countries as well) judge you without getting to know you.

So yes, take good care of yourselves. Be kind to each other and help those in need.

I'm supposed to be coding but it's no surprise that I'm not. I am totally stressed this week (and I can guarantee it will be this way next week too). I have a few assignments due this week and a lot due next week. I just can't get the motivation to do it. One of them is already late and I should have it in by tonight. Then, I get to start on my other stuff. I usually do 3 classes per semester but this semester I'm doing 4 and it's totally running me ragged. I can't tell you how many people have said that I look different, worn out and constantly tired. Every so often, I think about just throwing the towel in because I am so over studying. I'm so tired of it. I have no motivation to keep me going anymore.

I wish I could get out of this mood because I am just about done with this mess and it's actually pretty important (to me) that I get it done but... I'm... just... not... 

Speaking of procrastination, yesterday I spent most of my time watching YouTube videos about Whitney Houston and all the douchebaggery that happens with the crazy Baptist church in Kansas. I am absolutely perplexed and flabbergasted that they're not put down because they ARE a hate group... but then I remember stupid groups or cults exist (the KKK maybe?). I just can't see how people want to be spouting out so much hate and negativity though they're supposed to be one with God, etc. The leaders of that crap say so much stupid nonsense that I am quite happy that I am not 100% American anymore. Well, I still am a little bit but there are quite a few Americans that give us a bad name. I get to answer questions about the general stupidity of Americans all the time because whether the idiots know it or not, that kind of "shit" they do makes the people who escape look really, really bad. I don't sound enough like an Australian to be able to fake it. Sometimes I just pull out the "Sure, I'm a Canadian" card if it can be played. 

It's quite sad when people do stupid stuff and it reflects badly on all of us who live abroad. The whole gun control thing is a popular topic. I've said it before that if it were up to me, I'd just do a nation-wide ban like they've done here in Australia. Yes, people still get shot. People do get knifed but there's only so much damage that a person can do with a kitchen knife in a crowded shopping center or school. I am with a lot of people who say that the average Joe should be able to defend themselves but really, does a person really need an assault rifle for a robbery? No, they don't. 

Every single morning, I wake up and read about how someone in the USA has run into a university and shot 20 people in the face or a 4- or 5-year-old had killed his parents or his friend or something like that. (One that made me chuckle was about the guy who knifed 20 people... really???). It's a shame. How many times do you hear people in Australia pulling a crazy and doing something like that? You don't. That's because guns aren't allowed here. The craziness doesn't get extended to the levels that it does in the USA.

What's even more fun is that I do own guns. Yes, I do. I don't have them here in Australia, obviously. I do think that if the government would come and get them, melt them or whatever they do with them and it's done to curb gun violence, then so be it. I don't think I'd enjoy shooting a hole through someone the size of a pumpkin if they were robbing my house. The police? Yes, they should still have them (and they do here). 

I'm just kind of tired of hearing about all the crazies. Sure, the media soaks that stuff up like a sponge but if these things would stop happening (or a sharp decline), it would be wonderful.

I'm not really sure how something about my stressed out university career had turned into something about religious zealots then to gun violence, but hey... that's the joy of having a blog, right? A lot of people won't agree with me (especially where I grew up... you know the clinging to religion and guns... it's that kind of place).

Hello weekend and end of the Easter holidays. It's back to concentrating on my assignments now. Fortunately, I got some stuff done over the week but it's not much.

My housemate has gone overseas for about 3 weeks so I am going to try to enjoy my solitude. He's a good housemate though so I'll miss him a bit while he's gone however it gives me some time to sit around in my underwear like the good ol' days. It's probably one of the things I miss most from living "alone".

Since I'm always bitching and complaining about everything, I thought today's a nice day to share a little bit of what I am doing around here. The picture below is from a place in Melbourne Central called Japas. I've been there a few times already and every time I've been, it's been really good. The last time I was there (yesterday) with my friend, I got some Japanese curry. It was really good. :) I had eaten sushi earlier that day and I was a nostril hair away from getting even more (with the raw stuff). At the last second, I picked this:

Very good stuff! If you're around Melbourne, you should go. 

Now, back to programming. :)

Update time for those who want updates!

First, I want to say Happy Easter though technically it's Monday now. It's still a holiday for Australia so... yeah, gonna try to take another day of rest.

I am still alive but getting very behind with my classes so I am trying to do that now. We're on our mid-semester break now so I have about three weeks of catching up to do. Not fun. I've been trying to get some time in to do some work on my websites but I just can't manage to get that done.

An update on my podcast? Still in an induced coma. I'm okay with it.

Need to get some sleep eventually so I will go now.

Does anybody even read this stuff anymore? Ah, regardless, I will continue my bi-monthly therapy self-treatments.

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about marriage and relationships in general. You may remember that sometime last year I officially came out as gay to my closest friends and family (yet, a lot of them already knew, but this was the official announcement). If you've been around me for a lot longer than the past year, you may remember that in the beginning I didn't throw my support behind gay marriage (and not because it was wrong, immoral or any grounds like that, I just felt that it wasn't needed; I've totally reversed this thinking).

I've been reading up on the whole gay marriage thing and I've listened to people (through readings, videos and from real-time conversations) to see what people think and why they believe the way they do. I've never felt more like it's overdue than I do now.

What broke my spirit years ago is that I asked my then boyfriend if we would get married and he told me "no". It broke my spirit a little bit because I feel like I could have been with him long-term at the time and would have loved to do it. After he told me no, I began to think that it's acceptable though secretly, that's what I wanted. I wanted to have that relationship status with somebody. I wanted to have a family with someone but I guess he wasn't the one - I see that now. People keep telling me that they think we'll get back together some day. Things might turn out that way but only if those cards are dealt to me when I think they should be - not right now.

I find it interesting that since our breakup, I haven't really gotten myself together. Everybody who I date ends up hating my guts or just downright disappointed. I don't blame them and it's not that I want to hang on to something I've already lost but it's basically about not being able to date since I didn't really do much of it. When I do date, it's just... terrible for me. I don't really like it.

Unfortunately for us white folk, we don't age very well and I am seeing and feeling changes all over my body. I'm no longer twinkish, smooth and not as muscular. I think these things are bothering me quite a lot now. I am beginning to miss my youth. Hanging around at the university doesn't do very much for my self esteem either. I look at these guys and I say to myself "10 years ago, you probably could have had him". The thing is that 10 years ago I was in a relationship with someone that I thought I'd be with forever. Didn't happen. I am still a little bitter about it... but not hopeful.

On Facebook, I've noticed some of my friends getting into relationships and then getting "engaged" though it's not legal for two people of the same sex to get married yet. It gets to me a bit.

What I don't get though is why some people have such an issue with two adults of the same sex getting together, spending their lives together and having the same rights as married couples do. I'm not really sure why or how that affects other people's relationships. I'm not sure how making it legal will cause an influx of people magically thinking that they will be forced to get married to someone of the same sex. It's all small thinking. It's all horrible and I hope one day that this whole thing becomes a non-issue.

I think sometimes what life would be like if some people in the USA weren't so uptight about everything. I'm not anti-religion but wow, some of the stuff coming out of that country makes people worldwide go "What the fuck???"

New Zealand may be next to make the same-sex marriage thing legal. I am hoping that the Australian government is opening their eyes and ears because if it happens in New Zealand, Australians are going to demand change here. So, good luck New Zealand!

I know these paragraphs are just loosely stitched together. That's because I am just writing these things as they enter my head. Just excuse the unorganized state of this post. :)

I keep neglecting this weblog, don't I? It's okay because, as always, I am quite busy with the new semester and also from cleaning up some areas of my personal life. I need to alleviate a few problem areas of stress and I've taken care of some of it. I have a few other problems that are still swept under the rug and need to get those cleaned up.

I have also noticed that I'm not posting much on Twitter anymore as well. I feel like I'm in a small room of talking people and you know, saying a few things every once in a while. The conversations happening in that small room are all a little more interesting (or at times, random garbage, as with my tweets). It doesn't matter what I say, no one really cares. So I'm abandoning that for a while. I think most of the time, I go to just read up on a few people because they post some really cool things that are worth reading. It's a lot of tech-related stuff by normal people. I like that.

Another thing that I've noticed is that I am not posting too much on Facebook anymore as well to keep some of my dramatic personal life contained a little better. My Facebook account is used a bit more for personal bits of information because my family is there. Sadly, a lot of my family members don't even acknowledge the important happenings in my life. I try to keep them updated but I don't think a lot of them actually "care" what's happening anymore. 

The whole social thing is taking a back seat right now and it's not really because I'm sad that I can't be more of an attention whore, but it just seems like people don't care. Maybe I'm doing it wrong. Maybe I need to grab a random photo and put some text on it. Maybe I need to say that I need 1,000,000 Likes and I won't die from cancer. Maybe if people share something, then I will get that attention... but it comes down to me not really caring that much. 

Now, with all this negativity comes something positive... I do have some really awesome friends. I appreciate them a whole lot. I don't really get depressed that much anymore because of them and know if I moved a way I would miss them so terribly much. No, that's not ass-kissing, that's the truth!

I'm still alive. I promise. It's been a busy few weeks from me but I just got back from Sydney late yesterday from Mardi Gras. I have to say that it was great being back in Sydney after I haven't visited the city in approximately 12 years. A lot of stuff has changed and some of it for the better. Unfortunately, I am not at home yet so I haven't taken a look at my pictures yet and from what I gathered on my phone, I took a lot of sub-par photos but I'm sure I'll be posting some up when I have time... you know, for the people who still read this after all this time.

I'm also back for another semester of school this week. I missed my first day, but I need to play catch up. I have quite a few things to do this semester and a lot of stupid presentations which I usually suck at. They're mostly about 5% of my grade, so if I get half of that, I'm sure I will be okay.

I'll post my vacation details in a day or two, so keep watching this place. I need to head off to a lecture now. :)